不大笑男人不能嫁
我一直不欣賞周杰倫，主要是不喜歡他冷冰冰總是垮著一張臉的形象，最近看電視，主持人開了他一個相親玩笑，他居然摀著嘴笑起來(無聲)。這年頭，女人都不摀嘴笑了，男人還摀嘴？
這讓我想起媽媽曾給我的忠告：「不朗聲大笑的男人不能嫁。」以此標準，周杰倫是絶對不能嫁的。誰在電視上聽過周杰倫的笑聲，請舉手。
道理何在，我不能完全說清楚，不過觀照周圍的例子，這個忠告還相當準。
年輕時我曾喜歡一位男士，無奈他總不把意思表達清楚，媽媽從旁觀察，發現他從來不大笑，也就是說，只看到他嘴型瀟洒的往上翹，笑聲頂多是「嘻嘻」、「哼哼」，從來沒有「哈哈」。媽媽說：「嗯！這孩子心眼蠻重的，女兒，算了吧！」「我算了」十年後，輾轉聽到這樣的事：他父母都不願和他同住，他的姪子也受不了這個舅舅，原因是他非常挑剔，生活細節一定要照他的時間表和規範，而且有潔癖。
這不是說他不好，而是當一個人連朗聲大笑這麼快樂的事都感應不到，表達不出時，他的心眼沉到哪兒去了？
我的父母、兄弟、先生和我都是會朗聲大笑的人，我們也都是開朗自在的人，我們沒有潔癖，我們不嚴荷別人，不鑽牛角尖，我們很容易和人相處。
也許你會說，周杰倫那樣子是故意做出酷酷的形象，但是形象如果和個性衝突，總會露出馬腳，而周杰倫從來沒有露出過「大笑」的馬腳。如果一台在訪問周杰倫，一台在訪問許效舜，我一定看許效舜。
見諸周杰倫的戀愛誹聞，我也搖頭，當然，偶像不願承認戀愛也算正常，可是他也太瞹眛了，顧左右而言他的樣子讓人替女方不值，記得一回影視界頒獎典禮，當時仍是他女友的侯佩岑任主持人，台上有人開起玩笑，鏡頭掃到台下的周杰倫，他拿著節目單遮著臉，沒有笑容，一副很不以為然的樣子，反觀侯佩岑，笑得多麼大方可愛。
以笑聲判斷性格是否有道理，見仁見智，至少我是深信不疑的，當然，如果周杰倫和許效舜都向你求婚，你還是應該答應周杰倫。
留言
從前只顧自己大笑, 現在讀罷您的文章, 回味朋友\家人的笑聲, 回味無窮...
發表: Anonymous | March 3, 2008 01:28 PM
If I have no choice, I'll marry the rich one, suck him dry, then divorce him a few years later for irreconcilable differences.
發表: material girl | March 3, 2008 01:57 PM
I onlt marry for love.
發表: Anonymous | March 3, 2008 04:55 PM
臺灣的廁所文學:
上聯為: 鳥在籠中, 恨關羽, 不得張飛.
下聯為: 女在閨中, 思陽貨, 又怕 子產.
發表: Anonymous | March 3, 2008 07:05 PM
大陆茅坑门联:
天下英雄豪杰, 到此低头屈膝.
世间贞女节妇, 进来解带宽衣.
横批：天地正气
發表: Anonymous | March 3, 2008 07:25 PM
Material girl seems bear hatred to seek man for marriage. Scary !!! Is it to take revenge of man?
發表: incorrect concept of marriage | March 3, 2008 08:54 PM
Love and hate relationships are quite complicated. 50% of marriages in America ends up in divorce and 21% in China. Most divorces were initiated by women.
People can make mistakes at the beginning, or they are willfully married into it for love, companionship, or money. When circumstances change, people change too.
In material girl case, it is pre-agreed.
發表: 2nd Nai | March 4, 2008 01:59 AM
God creat men and he creat women to harness them. When they gain wealth, they find 2nd nai.
發表: Big Wife | March 4, 2008 02:17 AM
For years I've been waiting for a right man to come along. But I'm afraid that I can't hold out much longer because I'm forty now. My neighbor Bob is constantly eyeing at me. He is a short and fat guy. His wife is chubby as well. But she has filed a divorce on the ground of irreconcilable differences after 10 years of marriage. If he proposed to me, I would accept....
發表: Tall and Thin | March 4, 2008 03:52 AM
Love surely takes strange partners.
發表: Anonymous | March 4, 2008 03:54 AM
My husband used to beat me if I did not agree with him. "To love and to cherish, til death do us part" is a life sentence. If one cannot endure it, get out while one can before death do them part.....
發表: divorced | March 4, 2008 09:00 AM
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
發表: Wiseman | March 5, 2008 12:29 AM
If your wife wants to learn how to drive, don't stand in her way.
發表: Allstate | March 5, 2008 01:33 AM
Marriage is wonderful. My wife makes donuts; her helper (my lover) sprinkles powdered sugar on them. I eat them all.
發表: Baker | March 5, 2008 01:38 AM
金星是愛情之神. 沒有錢就沒有愛情.
發表: 二奶 | March 5, 2008 03:45 AM
太太命令要服從
太太外出要跟從
太太說錯要盲從
太太買東西要捨得
太太生日要記得
太太發威要忍得
太太出門要等得
發表: 三從四德 | March 5, 2008 06:12 AM
小鼻子男人不能嫁
鼻子叫财帛，就是代表理财，鼻子代表他有没有钱，如果鼻子小小的，不管说他当时的给你讲的多好的诺言，最后可能结了婚之后都会没有，因为鼻子小就是一个很大的缺失，表示财库不够，或赚钱能力不足。
發表: 大鼻子 | March 6, 2008 03:03 AM
Edison Chen has a straight and round tip nose which means richness and sexual prowess. I'm sure he'll come up again.......
發表: bobo | March 6, 2008 03:50 AM
我看到女人就笑, 可是沒有女人嫁 給我.
發表: 不孝男 | March 7, 2008 12:52 PM
不能對別的女人笑, 只能對我笑.
發表: 野蠻女友 | March 8, 2008 10:23 AM
Two proud men and a timid woman were sitting at a bar talking about their lives. One man said, "I'm a YUPPIE. You know, Young Urban Professional." The second man responded, "I'm a DINK. You know, Double Income No Kids." They then asked the woman, "What are you?"
She replied: "I'm a WIFE. You know, Wash, Iron, F---, Etc."
發表: Laughter, The Best Medicine | March 9, 2008 05:13 AM
嫁不大男人, 不能笑...
發表: 小男人 | March 9, 2008 06:26 AM
大笑男人不能嫁, 他會喝酒打老婆.
發表: 笑不出來 | March 9, 2008 01:24 PM
Big Nose:
My nose is OK, how big is your nose? Like Caucasians' nose? The have poor people too.
發表: Anonymous | March 18, 2008 05:20 PM
随意大笑的男人特别容易冲动，不识大体，冲动起来扁你没商量，如果你是个受虐待狂，这会是你最好的选择。
發表: 旁观者 | March 31, 2008 10:22 AM